Category: Dating and Relationships
This is a bit of a strange question so bare with me. I've often heard that women are more drawn to verbal, emotional and other things in their partners while men are primarily visually-oriented. So I'm wondering what attracts a blind or severely visually-impaired man. I'm not talking about things like openeness, honesty, clenliness etc. I mean right away. How do you know who you should "check out" as it were? And in the bedroom, the visual thing continues. For those of you who had vision, do you visualise things when you're with your partner or have other senses or factors taken over?
Personally, voice is the first thing, if a girl has a nice sounding voice, I try to get to know her better, thats when the personality things kick in. Its hard to describe exactly what is atractive about someone, but just as sighted men have things they look for when browsing a room, so do we, ours just happen to be auditory.
I agree with silver lightning. mainly voice, then personallity. personally the personallity means the most over how tall short fat or thin etc a woman is. I don't have to look for one now because I have candi but its always how woman put themselves across to. if she acts desperate she'll be treeted desperate and not taken seriously to.
Voice, personality, and smell? Yes smell is important to a blind man I think. A good smelling woman is a turn on. Now she could be not so great visually, but smell would come in to play. This is before you touch her right?
I have at least three friends rate the girl, based on the average of the rating and the standard deviation of the ratings as compared to prior ratings determines if there worth going after.
There's definitely truth in that last post. Voice, personality and perhaps to a lesser extent smell are the greater part, but often knowing that a girl is desirable to sighted guys can sometimes create a favourable bias.
Standard deviation and favorable bias? Doing Stats might help you determine if a girl is desirable or not, but it will not help you get that girl; unless she’s a statistician. I will say that there are some very cute statisticians out there.
Having some vision, I can say that looks are what attract me first. I don’t have a particular type in terms of who I am attracted to, but the type of girls that attract me are usually thin.
Voice isn’t that much of a big deal unless we are speaking about diction/parlance, and being from the East coast, not too much of a thick East Coast accent; it’s just not pretty: “yo baby, you wanna go out fa dinna tonight? I’m not much for baby voices, or girls who sound really sweet, but these things wouldn’t throw me off either.
Scent is tricky; sometimes a little funk is sexy. I will not say why. Usually though, someone who wears a nice scent does get my attention. I’ve noticed that spice, citrus, and fruity cents usually do the trick.
And let’s not forget about nice skin and soft hands.
Oh! Yes, personality does play a role as well. But it depends on the type of relationship I want with the person. Frankly, if I’m just in it for fun and so is the girl, then personality is not too much of a big deal and there isn’t a particular type that gets my attention more than others. The ones which attract me however are the ones which are just a little bit weird, off center, a little bit crazy…. I’m not saying clinically insane, just someone a bit more unpredictable than the average person. They can be very outgoing or shy, as long as they have that little edge to them.
For me it's voice and then personality. If a girl's got a nice sounding voice I'll be more liekly to make an effort to get to know her. Since I obviously can't see her I've got to go by something else. Physically I tend to be attracted to girls at least my height or taller but I wouldn't exclude shorter girls if I thought there was chemistry. I also really like a girl with nice hair that I can run my fingers through. Scent wise I'd have to say vanilla is the one that really gets to me...well that and Japanese cherry blossom. And I definitely look for sense of humor in a girl, someone I can laugh with about the same things. My current girlfriend is like that. Now all I have to do is find some way to get her safely away from her x husband so he won't be able to A. dictate how she can and can't live her life and B. keep using her for a punching bag. I've rarely ever seriously wanted to kill anybody in my life but I think I could do for him and not feel too much remorse over it, especially not after all he's put her through over their fifteen years of marriage. But that's for a whole nother topic so I'll end here.
These posts are really interesting. Those are actually alot of the things that turn me on about men too, voice and personality are the biggest for me, along with skin, age etc. I wonder if the gap is as wide with blind men and blind women as it is with their sighted counterparts. Btw, I forgot to mention in the first post, sexual orientation doesn't matter. All answers are welcome.
Well if you're talking about age my girlfriend is actually four years older than I am. My x fiance was three years older. All the rest have been a few years younger, well except for my very first girlfriend who was older than me by about five months.
There is a saying in Spanish:
"los hombres se enamoran por los ojos, Y las mujeres por los oidos."
Men fall in love through their eyes, and women throu their ears.
Blind or sighted, I think men are still more physical when it comes to atraction. I've never heard someone's voice and thought, I don't care what she looks like, I want her. for me the thought has always been, She sounds good, I wonder what she looks like.
I'm not saying blind guys are never interested in physical appearance. But for me voice and personality have always been more important.
I'm not big on posts that simply say "I agree!", but I second Bryan's comments all the way.
Here is what I need to know. I posted before, but you said first impressions I assume. Now If I could touch her, even just her hands well that would make a differents. I see people saying they like to run their fingers through her hair, but it I don't know her name I usually can't do that yet, so. Lol
Give us more meat to go on.
Of course playing with her hair would come later. That's why I say voice and personality first. I'm just saying that nice hair is one of the things I like about a girl physically. And it's more of an added bonus.
Well if I knew at what point we're at I could say more, but before I know her name smell, her voice, personality would be what brings my interest to her. Now if I know her name and we are close well that is another ball game. Lol
for me it's the voice and smell mostly. Also I have a thing for girls with accents. I guess if you're blind you'll have to go by the voice mostly but I would never be with a girl who was al McDonalds. Personality comes in of course but you can't judge that the moment you meet some one.
Voice can do it bigtime. I'm often attracted to very confident, social women. The loudest or one of the louder ones in the room. It's not a sure shot though; sometimes I can tell that she's used to being attracted to and for some reason I don't want to give her that satisfaction. Of course I also may realize that she's only the loudest because she feels small and needs to keep her mouth open. I don't like a particularly high-pitched submissive voice. I don't know how to describe the particular voice I like. You have to have power behind it though. Wishy-washiness doesn't really do it for me. Quiet girls are cute but they're hard to find as I can't hear them talk in a crowded room (or an empty one for that matter).
Either that or she's drunk. Voice was one thing my x fiance definitely had going for her. She had what can best be described as a voice like velvet.
Wow, this is an interesting board. I dated a guy once who was totally blind, and I'm not sure if he really was attracted to my voice at first, but when we started to skype, it was like a rocket just took off and we couldn't stop talking. So at least for me, voice, but mostly personality would have to be for me. Must have things in common, and the guy I hope at least, would be a sweet and honest and caring guy. I've never dated a totally blind person before, so when we met each other, his hands were fluttering all over me in public. He was so excited I guess he couldn't wait til he got home. It was mostly my hair and my shoulders and back he was feeling when we would hug and stuff. Then I guess when we got to my place he got the whole picture. But I have to say it was interesting, and something that I had to get use to since I've never had to go through that experience before. So I guess if I ever date another totally blind person, I guess I know what to expect lol. Anyway, I posted a topic up about the advantages of dating a sighted/blind person, it's an interesting topic, so read that if you want to. It kind of goes along a little with what this says to.
first empressions are usually based on voice, personality, intelect and sense of humor. I can't exactly explain how all these combine in my mind but with in 3 to five minutes of audio chat, I can usually figure out if i've got any attraction to the person. usually i get a general idea quite quickly but with in that 5 minutes it becomes more fleshed out. As every case and person is different, I can't say there's a majic formula that works each time. but its always a combonation of the things i listed.
i agree with the hair thing, really great bonus in a later stage of a relationship that can become. its by no means a deal breaker for me but still, it goes along way.
I've got enough sight to see what people look like so in that instance i'm curious but just with what i mensioned above, there is a combonation of things that can make someone attractive or not in my mind. no majic formula...
I guess the voice is the winner here.
I agree with I agree with most of these posts. Voice and personality are the ghings I look for in a girl. Yes, soft hands as well because of course they make the girl seem even sexier. lol The girl that I like right now has a good personality, a hot voice. soft hands, etc. Also, she has the same interests as I do, which is obviously essential for a relationship to work out.
In my experiences I've often been attracted by voice, scent and way of speaking. I admit I am a sucker for the sweet girl voice, I don't know why. Not oozing with baby talk - that's just creepy - but just sweet. It also helps if she can sing, though it's by no means a big deal if she can't. It seems like there is somewhat of a trend here, and I think I agree with most of it. Soft hands are very nice too. Scent is important for me because it shows that it usually means she's aware of her clenliness, and girls that take care of themselves are a must.
I'm in agreement with Striker here. It's a few things that atract me to a girl, not just one. A sense of humor certainly ranks up there, as does being a good communicator. I've been through relationships where the other person isn't such a good communicator, and in some respects, those were a waste of time. Well, not entirely,since I learned that good communication is important, but still. intelect is also an important thing for me. If I can't carry on an intelligent conversation with them, what good could they be as companions?
agreed with poaster above.
ok i'm a girl but what i like about guys at first voice and personality. then def sent and looks are just a plus but i'm attracted to tall guys with muscles lol
by order:
voice, smell, personality and the body itself.
At this point I'll go for a pulse.
I'd say from a guy's perspective, its voice, personallity, genuineness, plus other person must be a bit tactile - I don'ty get on well with partners who arn't really willing to get close at all, who find it hard to cuddle with and show physical affection etc.
J G
the things that attract me the most are her voice, intelligence, figure, long hair is a bonus, good grammer, short is not a must, but, I prefer it, she should have some class, someone who is interesting, open, sweet, etc. And if she uses herbal essences, that scores her bonus points.
I like a girl with long hair that I can run my fingers through. I'm particularly attracted to girls taller than me for some reason. That last isn't a must but it's definitely an attraction.